wherethesunisalwayshining

sprinkling positivity

How yoga can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves

‘Yoga is the perfect opportunity to be curious about who you are.’

A great quote. Yet for beginners, this may seem a bit confusing and mind boggling..

How on earth are you supposed to find out more about yourself through practising some postures and breathing?

Ever been to a yoga class determined to quieten the mind and be in a peaceful space.. then find the person practising next to you has really loud distracting breathing? You can’t really ask them to stop breathing so you have the choice of being agitated and annoyed for the next hour or to change your perspective and just accept it and let it be.

Similarly in life.. we may expect things to go in a certain way but then outside circumstances change it, we either accept them and adjust or we end up suffering and hurting because we resist and let our emotions get the better of us.

Being on the mat allows us to be. A time to come to the present moment, bring awareness to ourselves, watch the mind and listen to the body.

Attempting to be present in the now is something we all manage to do for only a short period of time before we get distracted.. let alone a 90minute class! By watching how present or how easily distracted we are on the mat, we can then see that this may reflect how present we are in the rest of our lives, spending time with loved ones but thinking of work? Spending time in work but thinking about what to cook for dinner? If this is the case then you may be present physically but not as you, this is how you let life slip by because you’re never really there if you’re not really present.

Being on the mat brings this new found awareness into your life.

Watching the mind can prove interesting in yoga, especially when you come to postures that appear difficult. The mind might say ‘I can’t do that’ before even trying. How many times does this then also reflect in your normal life? The mind might be too busy concentrating on how much more flexible your neighbours are compared to you leaving you feeling inferior ; could this also be true that you then spend a lot of time comparing your life with other peoples?

One of my favourite reasons I enjoy practising yoga or meditating is so I can see where my mind is at. Everyone’s state of mind changes from moment to moment depending on what’s happening. I can wake some mornings and be fully present and peaceful, other times my mind will be thinking of past, future, day dreaming and distracted and that then tells me that I need to put some extra work into achieving peace for myself and doing less.

It let’s you come to know yourself in a new way, listening and allowing you to help yourself.

How much do you listen to your body? Do you find that you will attempt the full posture instead of a variation because everyone else is doing that, even though your hamstrings might be yelling for you to stop pushing yourself. Or do you find that you could push yourself further into a posture but you like to relax and play it comfortable? Again, these things can all reflect in how you go about your daily life.

So.. Let the yoga mat be your place of learning, enter with an open-mind and child like curiosity. There is no need to judge any of these things that you may discover about yourself. Observation is simply watching, don’t take it too seriously and put a judgement of it being bad or good. See it as a game and say ‘thank you for that lesson, I can now be aware if I do something similar in daily life.’

‘Yoga is the perfect opportunity to be curious about who you are’

Namaste!

 

 

 

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Sometimes I am afraid to be myself.

Sometimes, I am afraid to be myself.

I am afraid to say what I really feel, to disagree with someone’s opinion, to stand up for what I believe in and to share my passion.

I feel a deep fire burning inside me that is almost like an itch.

It wants to dance but I allow it to dim from the shadows of a mask

I try to hide parts of myself that I am scared people won’t accept. Where does that unacceptance come from? I don’t accept it myself or I make assumptions about other people.

No matter how many times I cast a grey smog of smoke over my fire.. it stays lit, changing in different intensities at different moments.

Moments of intense pure joy come from sharing all of me with others, allowing my fire to dance as flames do.

Awareness brings a new moment, to constantly remind myself to be true. To me and to you.

Sharing is such a big part of my life now, sharing the journey of life with one another. connecting. learning. discovering.

So I finish with an intention to – accept me for me, and you for you.

 

 

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What do you really want?

What do I want?

How often do we truly ask ourselves that question, or how honestly do we really answer it?

It may appear to be a simple question but actually a lot of us know what we don’t want, or we will answer the basics of health, happiness, family and friends etc.

When it comes down to it we all want the same fundamental things.

But going beyond the mind, beyond the limitations and boundaries..

If I change the question to.. If anything and everything was possible, what would you want?

So often we don’t even allow ourselves to ask what we really want, we are a society that fear their dreams, because we are afraid to even acknowledge them.

In reality, beyond the minds limitations and boundaries that are only illusions, everything and anything is possible.

You see, unless we think or even acknowledge something in our minds then it’s not possible to manifest it. We have to ask ourselves these fundamental questions so that actually yes we can work towards our dreams, we can put energy into making the thoughts a reality.

So be courageous, take time to yourself. Ask yourself ‘What do I really want?’

If you find that to be too difficult – ‘If everything and anything was possible, what would I want?’.. you can ask yourself out loud, in your mind, through meditation, write it on paper. You are free to do anything.

Step outside of the walls your mind has built up, discover the secret garden of infinite possibilities within you.

Once you acknowledge what you want, work towards making it happen. Do you think Obama was a 18 year old guy thinking he was going to become the president? I’m guessing not but he obviously was working towards big things and had the thought in his mind at some point. Patience and small steps. Believe in yourself, we are all made of the same stuff, no one is superior or inferior to another.

If you answer your question, be careful to observe your mind. It may say you’re not good enough in some way,’ it’s not possible, don’t be silly.’ Just be aware of these thoughts and know they’re just thoughts, illusions, not reality unless you let them be.

Thoughts are very important, they play a huge role in our lives and most people have no idea what an impact they have. Thoughts really do create your reality so it’s important that you listen to them, observe. Let go of any negative thoughts that hold you back, just don’t attach.

There’s a saying ‘Where the mind goes, energy flows’ – be careful what you put your energy into. Positive outcomes or negative? You really are powerful beyond measure, you have the choice to choose.

So.. What do you really want?

 

 

 

 

 

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New Year rituals that benefit us

Happy New Year to each and every one of you beautiful souls.

I haven’t written a blog post in months… and yup I feel it. It feels great to be starting the New Year with a post!

I love writing and sharing with the world, if my post helps, inspires or plants a seed in one persons life.. that’s what makes me feel fulfilled.

So beginning the New Year in 2016, let’s take a look at how we can make sure we create a beneficial year for ourselves.

I watched a video the other day and It really hit home with me, a ring of truth. In the past I always assumed that rituals where a religious act and performed only by religious people etc.

In the video it exclaimed how actually, every single one of us have rituals, we just either aren’t aware of them or we brush them off as a habit (good or bad). We have rituals of the order we get up, read the newspaper in the morning, check Facebook first thing when we wake up, have a morning coffee and biscuit, have a cigarette break.. and so on.

As humans we are known to be creatures of habit.. its natural. But do we ever question our habits? These habits are our rituals. Yet what does smoking, scrolling on Facebook, watching the news; what does any of that really benefit us? The truth is our rituals in modern society don’t benefit us, the news only highlights negativity, smoking kills us and social media amplifies the ego and has us wishing we lived someone else’s life.

I used to read Facebook any time I was bored, needed time to pass.. sometimes i still fall into that trap. It’s addictive. The same as we can fall into the trap of eating at a certain time because its a ritual. The thing is we don’t connect with ourselves with our modern day rituals, we actually do the opposite. We don’t question if we are hungry, we just look at the time and say it’s time to eat, we don’t listen to our bodies. We don’t question if we really need that coffee today because its a ritual.

So here I am sharing with you small quick rituals for you to do, that will benefit your life instead of wasting time and spending it doing something unworthy or damaging for your health

1.Wake up and instead of going on your phone, actually make an effort to stay off it for the first hour. Technology takes up energy from you (not what you want waking up). Instead, think of 5 things you are grateful for. You can think in your head or say out loud.

2. Dedicate 10-15 minutes of your morning to meditating. Once you begin a practise and stick to the same time it gets easier, like every habit. It’s a great way to begin the day in peace, tuning in to how you feel. For example some days you may find it difficult to focus on meditating, this tells you that you’re mind is busy and agitated so you may need to have more time to calm. Other days you may fall asleep, this tells you you are to go to bed early. The body will always give us signs to show us what to do, but we have to make the effort to listen.

3. Go for a walk on your lunch break. Go experience the outdoors, use your sense of smell, touch, hearing and be grateful that you have those senses.

4. Stop for a minute or when you’re on the toilet each time take 3 deep breaths and concentrate simple on your breath.

5. Write in a journal about your day. This gives you a time to reflect on what happened, what made you feel happy, angry, sad, emotional. It gives you and idea of the things that trigger these feelings and perhaps how you can deal with them. Also it’s always good to know what makes you laugh. diaries can hold great memories too.

And there you go.. 5 rituals that benefit you. Rituals need some self-discipline to begin with, especially to replace old rituals. Habits/rituals are forms of addictions but once we replace them, we soon forget about the old ones. You will slowly see your life start to transform for the better.

We are responsible for the lives we create, if we put in the effort we can manifest our dreams into realities.

Lots of love

Sian

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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We have freedom to choose our thoughts

   

  by becoming aware of your thoughts and observing them, we become the witness. Witnessing gives you the power to decide what thoughts you want to keep or let go of. You have that freedom within you 🙂

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What you focus on grows

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Our words and actions affect each other

In the previous post I touched up on the ripple effect that we create when we unconsciously act negatively towards another person, and how it can impact their thoughts and beliefs about themselves or others.

I just wanted to explain a little more in depth of how this works. You may think a negative comment might not affect someone for the rest of their life and this may be true, but either way it will affect them. Do you want to be responsible for making people suffer?

We all have a great impact on each other when we are in contact. This being The general public, friends, acquaintances, partners, people we have relationship with, our family and parents.

I will give a few examples..

The general public, we may not have a life standing impact on these people who we brush past once in a blue moon, nonetheless we have impact. For example, working in a coffee shop it truly makes a difference when you have a customer come in with a happy, positive attitude and conversation, it has a positive impact on my day and I’m bound to have a much happier day just from the lift of that one persons positive energy.
Whereas if someone is rude and unkind towards me, I am less likely to be jumping for joy and this might affect me for the rest of the day
– which ripple effects onto other customers. The same can happen vice versa, if i was horrible to a customer it could ruin their day and they may never return after their bad experience.

As people we have an unhealthy habit of holding onto people’s words and actions and taking them personally.

However the most serious cases and more harmful are in our close relationships – with people we think highly of, people we care for or people we love. Being our partners, friends, lovers or family members.

A negative action or words will hurt deeper if it’s by someone you’re close to.

An example is flirting with other people whilst in a relationship and perhaps even cheating. The words and actions you use affect the partner, perhaps for life. It can knock self confidence and esteem, they may grow insecure about themselves. Many people have trust issues and find it difficult to let go and carry this to their next relationship. Did you ever consider that cheating on someone could affect that persons relationships for the rest of their lives? Or how they think of themselves? I have been guilty of doing this in the past, luckily I was young and completely unaware of how my actions affect others, it’s in the past and I forgive myself and let it teach me
for the future. If you have also treated someone this way, don’t beat yourself up but learn from it and it’s effects.

If you are a parent, be conscious of how you bring up your child, be aware of what you teach them of what you say to them and how you say it. Children already have so many pressures, they don’t need to be threatened by fear of not being good enough. I see so many children forced into doing things they don’t enjoy, living their parents dreams. Think of how this will affect your child growing up – does it show you support them to be themselves, giving them a foundation to being confident, to be who they want to be?

On the opposite hand, be aware of how you speak to your parents. It’s easy to take it out on our folks after a bad day. In my teenage years I used to say I hate you to their faces, I cant imagine how that felt for them. When we disrespect our parents, do something against them or let them down, imagine how that affects them. They may start believing they’re terrible parents, blame themselves, blame each other – causing friction in marriage. It can spiral in many directions.

Many things can add up more and more if you carry past memories into the future. I have also felt insecure, doubted myself and tried to change myself from being deeply unhappy with the feeling of not being good enough. This stemmed from people’s unconscious actions and words, people That I forgive because they were unaware to the affects they had on me.
It only came to my awareness through therapy how much we all affect each other. some large and some small things stuck with me for years, i am a sensitive soul who doesn’t take things lightly and I held onto many things from the past.

We all tend to hold onto hurt from the past from people’s unconscious actions, this is why it’s important to dig them out become aware of them and let them go. Forgive the people who acted unkindly towards you as they did without awareness from a hurt inside themselves. I also hope anyone I hurt in the past who is reading this, can forgive me for my unconscious actions or words.

I hope this long (sorry!) post helps you realise the different levels of impact we have on each other’s lives. Perhaps it will make you think twice before acting or speaking negatively.

Let go of the past and learn from it – bring awareness to your thoughts, words and actions 🙂

Where the sun is always shining x

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The ripple effect, how our actions affect other people.

We are all the same, underneath the outer layers we all have feelings, emotions. The things that block us from viewing it is that were driven by fear.

People who judge and criticise behave unconsciously, they’re unaware of the damage. This is why becoming conscious and aware of our thoughts, words and actions is so important. Everything we do has a ripple affect on other people.

Have you ever said something horrible to someone? I’m guessing so. Did you ever notice how it made you feel? I’m guessing not good. When we say something horrible to someone it’s not us, it’s our ego taking over and usually coming from a place of fear, anger or sadness.

For example in high school I remember a girl who loved drama, confrontation and starting arguements. She enjoyed picking on me and I never understood why. One day I was so fed up and in the end I called her fat. She didn’t actually respond to me and so I felt like I’d won. My ego felt superior, I’d had the last word. Yet inside I knew that’s not how I wanted to behave, I didn’t enjoy calling people names – nobody does. That name calling came from a place of anger. Yet I will never know how it affected that person, I will never know wether that name calling still rings in her memory. The same as she will never know how I remember her shouting and name calling rings in my mind. We both let our egos take over and rip chunks into each other with name calling and arguing.

This is all too common. If I would’ve listened to my soul, and been mindful I would have dealt with the situation very differently. I would see that the girl had much pain, something troubling her in life that she seemed drama and attention. She obviously felt she needed reaction, good or bad. If I would’ve seen this at the time I would have responded differently instead of reacting.

Hence why we build up guards around ourselves, become closed off to other humans, afraid to show who we truly are.

If we are open, we are vulnerable and risk being hurt by others who are unconscious. Yet if we are aware that their hurtful words or actions are exactly that – unconscious. Then we have a chance of putting a stop to reaction and ego taking over.

Hurtful actions and comments stay in our memories for years, hence why it’s imperative that we bring awareness to ourselves. Everything we do and say to people has an effect on them, we never know to some extent. We must stop acting unconsciously towards others, causing harm because of we let our ego take over just in a fleeting moment you can’t undo those horrible words or horrible actions. We can only apologise.

The other side to being aware and conscious of your thoughts and actions is that when you are personally attacked by someone – you can choose to diminish their comment or action. You can become aware that they are suffering and that is the only reason why they’re behaving this way toward you. No happy person who is conscious goes around verbally abusing people.

We are all divine souls, only our ego separates us.

For example a woman once had a go at me, I was in the wrong slightly but she made it a big drama and was so angry, the tone of voice etc was not very nice. I used my awareness and could see she was troubled with something so I didn’t react or argue back. I apologised and instead talked with her as a friend would.

In a different situation someone would feel personally attacked and get angry, the ego doesn’t like to be blamed and so you would react and shout back. This would only lead to hurtful comments and cause harm to each other.. No resolving.

Then hurtful comments stay with people and they carry them for the rest of their lives.

Next time think when you’re going to criticise someone, comment on their looks or the way they are. It’s all too easy to judge and criticise when we don’t know what someone’s going through.

The only reason we can know what someone’s going through is if they’re open and honest with us – the only way we can achieve that is through less judgment and criticism in the world so people don’t let fear keep them closed up and guarded.

We are not robots, we are alive and we have feelings. We are all divine souls deep down, sometime we unconsciously let the ego take over us and that’s ok, don’t beat yourself up, become aware of it and observe how it makes you feel. The other day I made fun of someone being different and called her weird behind her back, who am I to do that? It doesn’t make me a better person, it made me feel horrible, I don’t know what she’s going through in life, my quick judgement will only prevent me from getting to know her and she is probably a lovely person. Judgment and criticism only separates us, prevents us from bonding and sharing.

Next time you find yourself judging someone or criticising them, have a think. Become aware. Be conscious to your words and actions to yourself and others. Be open and honest and expect the same in return. Try to respond instead of react to other people’s egos.

Be the change you want to see in the world 🙂

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We are all beautiful unique beings. We can’t let fear get in the way of being proud of who we are

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Accepting the now – that is all you have

The moment right now is all we have.

The past is un changeable, the future is unpredictable and the now is all we have.

We all struggle with accepting things that are happening sometimes in the now.

The now always consists of things that are happening.

Eckhart tolle said – many things that happen, they’re all fleeting moments. Things, bodies and egos, events, thoughts, situations, emotions, desires, fears, dramas and ambitions. They come, pretend to be all important and before you know it they’re gone. Dissolved into the nothing of which they came.

How many times have you worried, stressed yourself out or suffered because of resistance to something that was happening in the now? I have plenty of times. ‘Why is this happening to me’, ‘It isn’t fair’, ‘I hate life’. This is all resistance to accepting something. We make life difficult when we resist what’s happening in the now.

Let’s say we are about to lose our house. This is a stressful, worrying and tense time. If we take a step back and look the situation rationally – it’s happening. We can spend time burying our heads in the sand, refusing to look forward and complaining that this is happening – creating suffering and essentially being stuck in the situation.

Or we can be accepting. This is happening right now – it isn’t going to be forever, it’s a fleeting moment. In the future we will look back and learn from this event. Accept it’s happening and use the energy to be productive and think forward instead of wasting energy on self pity , drama, complaining. (All of which is resistance).

We spend so much of our lives resisting what’s happening, wasting energy on things we cannot change. Surrendering and accepting the now is all we can do. If there’s something ‘bad’ happening right now in life, know that it won’t be forever. Think of previous events that seemed so bad, with time they got better. The now is forever changing, things that happen are forever changing. We can go with the flow of whatever happens and not let it affect us negatively or we create suffering by wishing it wasn’t happening.

The sun is always shining.

Whether it’s behind the clouds some days, the sun will always come out shining soon enough.

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