wherethesunisalwayshining

sprinkling positivity

Schedule in some ‘Me Time’

Scheduling in some ‘Me Time’ is vital for health and wellbeing, overall happiness and joy.

We seem to have jam-packed schedules these days in our busy society. Busy people, busy minds, busy busy busy.

You might always say you’d love to do something but never have enough time. Yup, I’ve been there and still find myself sometimes coming out with those words. The truth is, we have to MAKE time.

There is enough time, we just have to understand that we are responsible for how we use it. We have to take responsibility for ourselves, our life and how we spend it.

Scheduling in some time to spend alone, with no plans, is really important. It gives you this freedom and space to just be. You can actually tune-in with yourself and wonder what you feel like. Instead of going from one plan to the other, living a life of routine, it gives you a gap to just be.

Within this gap is where creativity and imagination arises. How often can we say we have the time to day dream, draw, paint, bake or read. Whatever our hobbies are!

We spend most of our lives working and then very little time expressing our passions, how does that lead us to a fulfilling life?

So I encourage you to carry on with your routine but schedule in some time to yourself with no plans of things to do.

There is much joy felt in actually pausing with nothing to do, nowhere to go and no one to see. A slot of freedom to actually honour yourself in that moment.

Whether it’s half an hour, an evening, a day off or a weekend retreat!

Step away from the smart phones, emails, communication and distractions!

I usually try dedicating half a day or a full one depending on how I feel, to myself. To just spend time alone with no plans set in stone. It gives me a sense of freedom to explore how I feel, to really tune-in and listen to myself and see what I feel like doing. Then honouring that. Sometimes I feel like walking, exploring, some times I feel like staying in and baking! It really differs but it’s so nice to not feel like ‘Oh I really don’t feel like doing that but I have to because I planned it’.

Today I began my morning off with really simple little things that brought feelings of great joy. I got up slowly with no rush, meditated for 15 minutes or so, paused as I was grabbing for my usual breakfast of muesli and thought.. hang on, I don’t feel like that today. I have time, and I feel like being creative.. the end product was banana oat pancakes galore!

The simplicity but the beauty in pausing and creating that time and space for yourself. A gap in the busy life and daily routine.. it really is an act of love and kindness, it is a space to honour yourself in the present moment and allow creativity, spontaneity and imagination to flow through.

So if you are like me and find there isn’t enough time for the day to pamper yourself, look after your mental or physical health, nourish yourself in any way that resonates with you. Schedule it in, without feeling guilty or judgemental. It is not selfish to have time doing nothing, this is just an illusion within our society, which is why we have so many people feeling drained, exhausted and sick. In fact you will discover that once you have dedicated the time and space for yourself, you will be much happier and joyful with others.

I always find whenever I’m reaching for that extra coffee, that’s the sign of my body telling me to slow down and make some ‘me time’. Our bodies are magnificent creations that give us signs of all that we need every moment, all we have to do is listen 🙂

With love

Sian

 

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Look deeply into nature and then you will understand everything better

‘Look deep in to nature & then you will understand everything better’
Genius Abert Einsteinbud

Perhaps unbeknown to you, you are a flower.
We are all the same but different.
Universally the same species, individually unique.
Growing and blossoming in our own time, yet all on the same journey of growth together.

We all have our moment of darkness, held tightly in a bud. The layers and walls that keep us safe and protected are a part of us, we have put them up. Yet they also keep us trapped, hidden in the dark within the claustraphobic environment that we have created. Within our bud, we live in the life of duality.. perhaps we are in the darkness, struggling to breathe in this way of life, needing the light but afraid to step out of our comfort zones, fearing what is on the other side. Yet we stay in this discomfort because it is also safe and protected.

But you are a flower. You are not made to spend your entire life in a tightly secured protected bud. It is deffinitely a part of the journey, but it is only the beginning of it. To grow unfolds from within, to unravel the layers that have made you feel protected and let them fall away. To get rid of the old and make space for the new. To uncover the beauty within and let the colour and fragrance of who you are underneath, show through.

Be curious and search for the light. This is where you thrive, this is where true inner beauty is seen.

Be courageous, watch yourself grow, let those old layers fall away because they are the walls that hide who you are. They are the walls that hide the light.

Surrender to what you are. Be curious about what you are. Be gentle and be patient, you are delicate. Remember you are beautiful, imperfectly perfect, incomparably unique yet a part of one which is life.

Life is a journey of growth as nature shows us.
Don’t live most of your life hiding, make space to grow.

You are a beautiful flower, allow yourself to vulnerable, allow yourself to open and be seen.

flower.jpg

 

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What are you Doing?

What are you Doing?

This is one question that triggers a whirlwind of thoughts, feelings and emotions for me.

For years I have been growing up with people taking general interest in my life and asking the innocent question – ‘So, What are you doing next?’, ‘What are you doing at the moment?’, ‘What are you doing next week?’

I have heard these four words far more than I’d like to.

The truth is the question creates bouts of anxiety within me. People ask out of interest, good nature, general polite chit chat. Not quite realizing perhaps what they’re asking.

When I hear these 4 words I hear expectation and pressure.. and what I feel when I hear these words are anxiety, guilt, uncertainty and failure. Because the answers usually is I don’t know.

I guess my perception has become warped with my own insecurities on the matter but I am sure that I am not alone as many of us are in the same boat.

When someone asks ‘What are you doing’ – I feel they expect me to know, and I don’t know so there’s uncertainty and I feel like a failure for not knowing. I also feel pressure that I should have a plan, and then I feel guilty again for not having one.

The thing is I don’t have a plan. I have learnt through life experience and travelling that plans don’t always go to plan. Life does it’s thing and we can choose to accept where we are or suffer with non-acceptance and wishing to be somewhere else.

I actually find this topic quite hard even to write about, it creates tension within me. When I was travelling I was able to answer this question much more freely and laid-back, because everyone seems to be on the same wavelength, not knowing where we’re going but trusting it’s ok and allowing things to unfold exactly as and when they’re meant to.

The thing is there’s a lot of freedom in ‘I don’t know’.

I say this from experience – I left my uni course to a year of ‘What are you doing; I don’t know’ scenarios and decided enough was enough and went travelling and working abroad – something I’d never done if I’d stuck to my safe certain uni degree that didn’t make me happy.

Possibilities arise if we are open to them. Changing perspective is fundamental, it’s the only thing we have control over, we have a choice.

Will your ‘I don’t know’ be one of despair, stress and anxiety – (which doesn’t make you know any more 😉

Or can you allow it to be exactly what it is.. at this very moment in time you don’t know. Which gives you the opportunity to explore, discover new things, places. Volunteer, try something different.

There is nothing wrong with not knowing where your life is heading.. in fact nobody knows. There is no certainty for how life will unfold. Isn’t that the magic of it all?

Not knowing what magic is around the corner, what opportunity can arise if you open yourself to the infinite possibilities that the world has to offer?

Go volunteer in Africa, Go raise money for charity, Go explore a new way of living. If you don’t have a next step plan in life – Take it as a sign from the Universe that you’re meant to explore now. You are free.

I know the next time someone asks me ‘What are you doing’ I am hoping I will of changed my perception a little and have the courage to answer from my heart..

‘I don’t know but I know it’s on the way, I am just going with the flow of life and letting it unfold as it is, when I’m supposed to know then I will know. For now exploring, discovering and learning is what I’m doing and I know every piece of the puzzle will finally fit together when the time’s right.’

Trust in yourself. Trust in Life. Recognize your freedom in unlimited possibilities, they are waiting out there for you.

 

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Practise what you preach

So after posting about welcoming suffering or transformation and questioning its purpose last night.. Life gave me te opportunity to practise what I preach this morning! Always on que.

So recently I’ve been feeling off balance for a good few months, lacking energy, unmotivated for my practises of yoga and meditation etc. this morning it really hit me, I was frustrated because my mind wanted to do it but I couldn’t find the motivation. So I sat feeling frustrated thinking I wish I could go back to when I was rearing to go and really enjoyed practising. 

As I was writing this in my journal I caught myself.. This feeling of suffering and frustration was or a reason, to change something that’s no longer working. It’s true I have felt off balance and I now need to meet this suffering and act on it.

 Our bodies are incredible things, always informing us on what’s happening and once we realise it that’s when we have to meet it half way and act, change something. We might know this but physically find it difficult to take action straight away, and that’s ok. Be patient with yourself. 

I have felt this way for months and haven’t taken real action, always waiting for a right moment. But the right moment is only when we finally get so fed up of this feeling and do something. 

As for me, I am going to try to bring some self discipline back, a routine of practise without labelling it as feeling good or bad. I’m also going to eat pure foods that helps detoxify my body. Combined with stretches to energise my body. 

Take some time out to see what your soul is asking from you. Be kind and be patient with yourself most importantly! 

The sun is always shining 

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Scrolling down my newsfeed on Facebook I have been surprised by how many people now post about anxiety/depression/OCD.. Some form of mental illness. The first thing that pops into my mind is why? Yes mental health is less of a taboo subject now but why is there such a high percentage of people suffering? 

If you are suffering, have you questioned its purpose? Because everything has one.im recognising a huge shift in society that begins with suffering.. We are restless, bored.. We don’t have a purpose or we’re not fulfilling it. The purpose of suffering is to bring change, and if you are suffering from any of the above right now, have you brought awareness to how you have changed? Perhaps not drastically, but are you more compassionate and understanding of human beings? Perhaps you have learnt more about yourself, what you do and don’t like. 

I’m sharing this for you to know that actually your suffering has purpose, it’s there for you to change whatever’s making you unhappy. So welcome that suffering, it’s a grey teacher, it’s not forever. Happiness comes and goes as you well know, remember the same can ony be for suffering. 

Dot resist change, I know it’s difficult to go past ‘wanting things to go back to how they where’, but this suffering has come about because you weren’t happy before, perhaps something in your unconscious mind triggered it. Welcome suffering and welcome change.. Sometimes there’s far better things on the other side if we let go.

It’s not easy, we all have periods of suffering, some short some long, varying in intensities. We are all human, we are all the same. 

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New Year rituals that benefit us

Happy New Year to each and every one of you beautiful souls.

I haven’t written a blog post in months… and yup I feel it. It feels great to be starting the New Year with a post!

I love writing and sharing with the world, if my post helps, inspires or plants a seed in one persons life.. that’s what makes me feel fulfilled.

So beginning the New Year in 2016, let’s take a look at how we can make sure we create a beneficial year for ourselves.

I watched a video the other day and It really hit home with me, a ring of truth. In the past I always assumed that rituals where a religious act and performed only by religious people etc.

In the video it exclaimed how actually, every single one of us have rituals, we just either aren’t aware of them or we brush them off as a habit (good or bad). We have rituals of the order we get up, read the newspaper in the morning, check Facebook first thing when we wake up, have a morning coffee and biscuit, have a cigarette break.. and so on.

As humans we are known to be creatures of habit.. its natural. But do we ever question our habits? These habits are our rituals. Yet what does smoking, scrolling on Facebook, watching the news; what does any of that really benefit us? The truth is our rituals in modern society don’t benefit us, the news only highlights negativity, smoking kills us and social media amplifies the ego and has us wishing we lived someone else’s life.

I used to read Facebook any time I was bored, needed time to pass.. sometimes i still fall into that trap. It’s addictive. The same as we can fall into the trap of eating at a certain time because its a ritual. The thing is we don’t connect with ourselves with our modern day rituals, we actually do the opposite. We don’t question if we are hungry, we just look at the time and say it’s time to eat, we don’t listen to our bodies. We don’t question if we really need that coffee today because its a ritual.

So here I am sharing with you small quick rituals for you to do, that will benefit your life instead of wasting time and spending it doing something unworthy or damaging for your health

1.Wake up and instead of going on your phone, actually make an effort to stay off it for the first hour. Technology takes up energy from you (not what you want waking up). Instead, think of 5 things you are grateful for. You can think in your head or say out loud.

2. Dedicate 10-15 minutes of your morning to meditating. Once you begin a practise and stick to the same time it gets easier, like every habit. It’s a great way to begin the day in peace, tuning in to how you feel. For example some days you may find it difficult to focus on meditating, this tells you that you’re mind is busy and agitated so you may need to have more time to calm. Other days you may fall asleep, this tells you you are to go to bed early. The body will always give us signs to show us what to do, but we have to make the effort to listen.

3. Go for a walk on your lunch break. Go experience the outdoors, use your sense of smell, touch, hearing and be grateful that you have those senses.

4. Stop for a minute or when you’re on the toilet each time take 3 deep breaths and concentrate simple on your breath.

5. Write in a journal about your day. This gives you a time to reflect on what happened, what made you feel happy, angry, sad, emotional. It gives you and idea of the things that trigger these feelings and perhaps how you can deal with them. Also it’s always good to know what makes you laugh. diaries can hold great memories too.

And there you go.. 5 rituals that benefit you. Rituals need some self-discipline to begin with, especially to replace old rituals. Habits/rituals are forms of addictions but once we replace them, we soon forget about the old ones. You will slowly see your life start to transform for the better.

We are responsible for the lives we create, if we put in the effort we can manifest our dreams into realities.

Lots of love

Sian

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Recognizing the power behind your thoughts

Recognizing how your thoughts create an impact on your life is essential for everyone, especially if you find yourself suffering from unhappiness, discontentment, depression, anxiety and stress.

All of which are the outcome of negative thought patterns.

The good news.. we can change our thought patterns into positive ones, creating a positive life!

Our thoughts create our reality..

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN, you may well ask.

THOUGHTS  =  EMOTION  =  SENSATION  =  ACTION/ IMPULSE/ BEHAVIOUR.

Let’s say for example,

The kid’s are fighting (scenario)

‘These kids never listen to me, I can’t cope with this right now’ (thought)

Overwhelming feeling of stress and anxiety. (emotion)

tightness in the chest, shorter breath and muscle tension. (sensations)

shouting at the children, crying and perhaps smack them. (Action/Impulse/Behaviour)

Another example,

You’re with your partner and he’s talking to his really kind and beautiful friend. (scenario)

‘Why is he with me when he could do so much better, what if he leaves me because i’m not good enough.’ (thought)

Overwhelming feeling of panic, jealousy, anxiety. (emotion)

Heavy feeling in the stomach, adrenaline, fast heart beat (sensations)

Act needy and insecure with the partner, controlling and demand the partner not to see her again. (action/impulse/behaviour)

So, you see how easy it is for our thoughts to affect our reality? Creating and shaping our lives and the situations that arise.

Bring awareness to your thoughts and recognize the power behind them, this way you are taking control of your life and choosing what you bring into your reality and what you attract.

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Tuning in with your thoughts

Thoughts.. We have so many running in and out of our minds on auto-pilot that we aren’t even aware of most of them..

We have variations of thoughts, some pop up completely random, some we think regularly (like lists of things to do), some are memories from the past and some are illusions of the future.

Most of the time we don’t even know because we aren’t even aware of our thoughts, they’re running in and out without a pause to observe or contemplation.

With awareness and observation of your thoughts you get to know yourself better and can make significant changes to improve your life..

  • Taking notice of the voice/tone you speak to yourself in.

We all have a critique up there in the mind, bringing awareness to how we speak to ourselves can be shocking for some people. Also bringing awareness to the tone.Let’s say you’re answering a question in front of a class and getting the answer wrong, the critique within might pipe up and say ‘ well done stupid, you just made yourself look like a right idiot.’ Noticing how you speak to yourself is crucial as it can be really damaging for your self-esteem and confidence.

  • Noticing if you honour yourself and listen to yourself,

Bringing awareness to your thoughts can help you tune in and listen to yourself. Let’s say you’re really tired and run down, all you want is an early night in, then work calls and asks you to work a shift and before you even know it you’ve said yes. Inside you’re screaming no and can’t think of anything worse, but you felt compelled to say yes to please others, to make others happy even if that means you suffer. That is not giving yourself the love and care you deserve.

  • Noticing how you interact with others, are you judgemental/critical?

We all fear judgement from others, that is why we do what others expect from us. We care about what others think of us, whether they know us or not. Bring awareness to your thoughts and you will notice the judgements and labels you put on people just from their appearance or actions. You may decide you don’t like your mum’s new boyfriend because the first time you meet him he is very quiet and appears rude by not making an effort. This would be your judgement, probably without considering how he would be feeling, perhaps scared,nervous or overwhelmed. Usually through judging others we make assumptions which aren’t accurate and lose the chance of connection and new relationships.

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You have the power

Slide15

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Taking responsibility instead of blaming others

We have control over ourselves, we have the power.

By blaming someone, we give that power away, we give it to them. We are saying, it is your fault that I feel like this – which is essentially saying, you have control over me and my feelings.

Saying someone else creates your suffering is not taking responsibility for yourself. You are in control of your own life.

I used to really struggle with this. I would get so frustrated and upset because other people would do things that annoyed me. I blamed other people for my unhappiness. But it was my perception. I let myself get annoyed at external things beyond my control, until I learned that I control how I  view things.

Last week I began to get stressed and frustrated looking after a child who is pretty demanding and craves attention. My mind was on auto-pilot thinking, ‘ she’s so demanding, ungrateful, needy and controlling. it’s her way or no way.’ This kind of thinking just led me to feel more and more annoyed every time she’d have a new injury or be demanding my attention without any patience.

When I became aware of my thoughts I realized the effect they where having on my body (stress,anxiety,muscle tension) and how I was acting colder, blunter with the child. Both things I didn’t want.

So as I stepped out of auto-pilot, I took responsibility because I know that it was only my perception at fault. The way I was viewing the situation was as if my thoughts and assumptions where the truth. Thoughts and assumptions are not truth.

Instead I decided to be curious, this child would never choose to be this unhappy with herself, she doesn’t choose to get stressed out,cry at little things, she doesn’t choose to be so needy and demanding of her mum. There must be more depth to it than I am currently viewing. I understood she has insecurities, she needs attention because she is missing something. With understanding, I began to grow compassion and empathy and realised theres a lot more depth to this little person than I know.

There’s a lot more depth to each and every person, more than we will ever know.

So I had that transformation with our relationship, by taking responsibility and deciding to change my views instead of just blaming her for my anxious state.

When we take responsibility for ourselves, we recognize our power and control. We recognize the freedom of choice.

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